Friendly Imposters

“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can… make me bitter and angry.”

A couple of years after I moved to Texas, I thought I’d developed some really great friendships with two young ladies I thought would become great staples in my life. I was beyond excited since I was so lonely in Austin.

For months I would call my mom crying because I didn’t have any friends. There was no one I could link up with for a fun girls night or to get out of the house when I was homesick. I truly believed the women that befriended me were answers to prayers. I believed that they truly cared for me and were excited to have me as an addition to their lives as I was theirs.

That was until they decided to take me out to dinner and tell me all of the things they thought were wrong with me and hated about me.

I had a decision to make– Do I allow these women to define what true friendships are and never let anyone become a true confidant?

To say I was blindsided and crushed would be an understatement. I was so caught off guard that I couldn’t defend myself, and for those of you that know me you know that means I was really hurt. I left the restaurant confused and torn to shreds. “How could they do this to me? I thought we were friends? I thought we were a team, a sisterhood?” I replayed the conversation and those questions over and over again trying to figure out what I’d done wrong. I wasn’t perfect but I was a loyal friend – always have been.

In the coming days, I had a decision to make– Do I allow these women to define what true friendships are and never let anyone become a true confidant or do I continue to trust God to bring me friends that will be worthy of my heart, loyalty and vice versa?

Though my relationship with those women never recovered–I no longer trusted them–I decided to trust God. About a year later, I met some amazing women that have been TRUE godsends and we’re still very close. They’re like my sisters.

When we run into bad apples or imposters along the way of believing God for something or someone, don’t allow that to deter you from holding firm to your promise or prayer coming to pass. That terrible moment could’ve made me a bitter woman towards friendships but instead, I chose to fight for what I knew was possible, and the pain, scars and tears were, without a doubt, worth the beautiful, strong friendships I have today. 

Photo by Mārtiņš Zemlickis on Unsplash